How to Fangirl

Step 1: become obsessive about something.  It doesn't matter what you choose to obsess about.  It can be a TV show, movie, book, person, food, anything.  Just pick something and make sure at least 35% of your life revolves around that thing.

Step 2: Make sure enough of your feelings are invested that you have done all of the following things regarding your subject:  laugh, cry, scream, wave your hands around, collapse on your computer.

Step 3:  Try your best to keep it a secret for as long as possible, until you just can't hold it in anymore

Step 4:  Explode and tell all the internet/every single one of your friends how obsessed you are.  Claim that you need professional help but don't even pretend to try to accept any advice.

Step 5: Find other fangirlers on the internet.  The internet is an amazing place where all fangirlers can come together in their fangirl-ness.

Step 6: Embrace that fact that this will be a part of you until you move on to something else to fangirl about.

Step 7: Write a blog about how to fangirl.

Change

Things are changing around my apartment.  My roommate who was very close to engagement (after 5 weeks of courtship) took her boyfriend to Arizona to meet the parents.  They come home, and she breaks up with him. She's going on a mission now.

My other roommate, who is "A STRONG INDEPENDANT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A MAN," now has a boyfriend who is actually super cute to her and isn't as weird as my other roommate's now ex-boyfriend

My other other roommate's missionary came home a few weeks ago, but she is unsure whether she wants to settle down and marry him, or date this other guy or something.

I made a really really good sandwich the other day.

Post-Disney Depression

I am home from Disneyland.

Home is a weird concept.  At Disneyland we would say, "do you want to go home?" but no one ever meant Utah.  They meant the hotel.  But now I'm "home" which is my apartment.  What I have considered my home my whole life is now somebody else's home.  My parents are living in my sister's home until they have their own.  We're all in this limbo stage, so it's no wonder I'm feeling scrambled lately.

I have been back for one day.  In that day I spent one hour in class, two hours doing extra credit, maybe 45 minutes doing homework, and the rest of the time...I don't even know.  Laying on my floor, playing Uno with my roommates, doing anything--anything--except the mountains of homework my teachers assigned while I was gone (which they failed to tell me about the 14 times I went to them before my trip).

I picked a pretty good time to go, though.  I have to truck through this week, and then it will be Thanksgiving break.  I also missed the election, which was AWESOME.  Remind me to stay off facebook that whole week in 2016.

Lyric Essay 3: letters

To Whom It May Concern:

I am writing to complain about the service I experienced at the Disneyland parks this week.  I have always been pleased with Disney in the past, and had very high hopes for this trip.  However, I was sorely disappointed.  My family purchased 5 day passes because we have loved going to Disneyland.  The line situation, however, proved trying to our Disney love.  Those with 1 day passes were cruising through the lines in five minutes, but our lines (of which there were only two) were one to two hours long.  I don’t feel like we should be punished for wanting to spend more time in your park, in which we will spend more money.  This seriously hindered our ability to have a good time.  Please work on those things in the future, or I will be hesitant to visit again.

From,

Hannah Wing

Dear Miss Wing,

We treat all of our gests the same, and we are not trying to punish you for buying longer tickets.  People have been selling their longer passes and we are trying to eliminate that problem by having ID checked, but we don’t have enough cast members trained to do so. We weren’t anticipating such long lines.

Disney

Dear Disney,

Whatever you were trying to do is irrelevant.  You weren’t doing a good job.  We pay a premium to go to Disneyland because we trust that you know what you are doing.  This system has been in place for several weeks now, and you have the resources to train more people and open more lines.  Furthermore, when I tried to complain, my thoughts weren’t heard, and were written off as unimportant.  Just because you are a huge corporation with infinite money doesn’t mean you can treat the customer like they are unimportant peons.  Instead of being a magical time, it was a time of tears and frustration.  Why did you betray me, Disney? Why do you hate us?

Hannah Wing

Miss Wing,

Whatever. We don’t care about your problems and we don’t need your business.  Besides, you’ll come crawling back to us anyway, so why should we try to make you happy?  Go complain to someone who cares. 

Lyric Exercise 2: How To

Step one: Convince yourself not to go, because what college student has the time or money to go to Disneyland for the week?  This is the logical thing to do.  Accept the fact that you family is going to Disneyland without you, and make sure they get you a post card while you keep studying hard and gaining an education.

Step two:  Call your mom in the middle of the night after watching home videos of the whole family in Disneyland, sobbing about how you don’t even remember the trip to Disneyland when you were too young, and you don’t have memories of your siblings.  Apologize for being so irrational, but beg to come along, if just for a few days.

Step three: Have your mom decide you simply need to go the whole week.  Make sure she already buys your tickets so you are forced to go. Be happy but also inconceivably stressed out

Step four: On the first day of school, check the syllabus of the week you will be gone and already begin freaking out about the four school days you will be missing.  Try to plan ahead as much as possible, but acknowledge it will be virtually impossible until a few weeks before hand.

Step five: As the time draws nearer, approach your professors about what work you can complete ahead of time.  Some of them will be helpful.  Some of them will try to help, but fail miserably.  And others just want to see you cry.  Persevere.

Step six:  A few days before you leave, when your teachers will actually tell you what you need to do, spend all day and all night preparing to be gone.  Anticipate teachers switching three week mandatory projects for one of the weeks you were gone.  They will not tell you ahead of time.  They will be unabashed.  Perservere.

Step seven: Stay up the whole night before you fly out desperately trying to accomplish as much as you can while being nauseous with excitement for your trip.

Step 8:  Listen as roommates, teachers, friends, strangers tell you how lucky you are to be leaving.  Acknowledge that you are, but feel like screaming at them, emphasizing how much you have sacrificed to do this.

Step 9:  Have a very kind and loving friend drive you to your sister’s house in South Jordan where you will proceed to the airport.  Feel guilty about using your friend in tis manner.

Step 10: Get to South Jordan and realize you forgot your wallet.  Call your roommate in hysterics, waking her up and begging her to bring it to you.  Cry a lot.  Cry even more when she gets there, hugging her until she can’t breath and exclaiming to her that you owe her your life. 

Step 10: Go through airport formalities, and then sit next to your nephew on the plane, and recognize how lucky you are to be right here, right now. 

Lyric Exercise 2: How to

Step one: Convince yourself not to go, because what college student has the time or money to go to Disneyland for the week?  This is the logical thing to do.  Accept the fact that you family is going to Disneyland without you, and make sure they get you a post card while you keep studying hard and gaining an education.

Step two:  Call your mom in the middle of the night after watching home videos of the whole family in Disneyland, sobbing about how you don’t even remember the trip to Disneyland when you were too young, and you don’t have memories of your siblings.  Apologize for being so irrational, but beg to come along, if just for a few days.

Step three: Have your mom decide you simply need to go the whole week.  Make sure she already buys your tickets so you are forced to go. Be happy but also inconceivably stressed out

Step four: On the first day of school, check the syllabus of the week you will be gone and already begin freaking out about the four school days you will be missing.  Try to plan ahead as much as possible, but acknowledge it will be virtually impossible until a few weeks before hand.

Step five: As the time draws nearer, approach your professors about what work you can complete ahead of time.  Some of them will be helpful.  Some of them will try to help, but fail miserably.  And others just want to see you cry.  Persevere.

Step six:  A few days before you leave, when your teachers will actually tell you what you need to do, spend all day and all night preparing to be gone.  Anticipate teachers switching three week mandatory projects for one of the weeks you were gone.  They will not tell you ahead of time.  They will be unabashed.  Perservere.

Step seven: Stay up the whole night before you fly out desperately trying to accomplish as much as you can while being nauseous with excitement for your trip.

Step 8:  Listen as roommates, teachers, friends, strangers tell you how lucky you are to be leaving.  Acknowledge that you are, but feel like screaming at them, emphasizing how much you have sacrificed to do this.

Step 9:  Have a very kind and loving friend drive you to your sister’s house in South Jordan where you will proceed to the airport.  Feel guilty about using your friend in tis manner.

Step 10: Get to South Jordan and realize you forgot your wallet.  Call your roommate in hysterics, waking her up and begging her to bring it to you.  Cry a lot.  Cry even more when she gets there, hugging her until she can’t breath and exclaiming to her that you owe her your life. 

Step 10: Go through airport formalities, and then sit next to your nephew on the plane, and recognize how lucky you are to be right here, right now.  

Lyric exercise 1: Fear

Fears of stopping on railroad tracks, fears of fire and of bees.  Fear of never truly being accepted, fear of never being loved.  Not if they truly knew who I was.  Fear of bugs in my produce and fears of not being able to fall asleep at night.  Fears of forgetting something, fears of remembering something.  Fears of staying the same way forever, fears of changing too much.  Fear of failure, and fear of success.  Fear of working hard, fear of never accomplishing anything. Fear of getting married too young, fear of not getting married at all, fear of marrying the wrong person, fear of a marriage ending too soon. 

Fear that I’m not capable, fear that I’m not living up to my potential.  Fear I’m letting others down, fear that no one cares what I do.  Fear I fear too much, fear I don’t fear enough.